A Disheartening Conversation...

Dude: "So you want to be a writer, eh?"

Me: "No. I AM a writer."

Dude: "I mean a PUBLISHED writer."

Me: "I AM a published writer, that's what I'm saying."

Dude: "Ah, well, self-published doesn't count, does it?"

Me: "I'm NOT self-published, man. I have a book out from an actual publisher."

Dude (frowning thoughtfully): "How come I've never heard of you, then?"

Me: "I... well, I don't know. I mean, most people haven't. It's a small press, and, um... a niche market, and all."

Dude: "Right. That's very cute."

Me: "The book has gotten very good reviews."

Dude: "Hey, we all gotta start somewhere. Don't feel bad about it."

Me: "I DON'T feel bad about it. Well, I DIDN'T, a minute ago."

Dude: "Keep following your dreams, man."

Me: "Excuse me while I go hang myself from the rafters now."

Dude: "Right on."